I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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