Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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