WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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