i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
