She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
