...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
