dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
