woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I think I just sharted jello shots
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize