In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Randomize