K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
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apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
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I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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