Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize