Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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