i just google imaged poop.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
