I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
