No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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