i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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