Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
