hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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