Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize