Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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