i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
dude. I can hear the air.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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