So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
someone owes me an orgasm
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
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my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
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I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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