He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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