You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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