I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
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