Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Randomize
