if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He called his prostate his "boner button".
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
