guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
You're like the curious george of whores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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