someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
