i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
