I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Randomize
