i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
