i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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