i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
