ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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