i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize