He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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