your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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