I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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