you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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