Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You ate ashes out of my bong
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
