so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head