You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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