You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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