there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize