it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
This is the high leading the old right now
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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