none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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