so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
