How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
