Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
